Former SISTAR member Soyou discussed her experiences with love, marriage, and relationships in a video uploaded to her YouTube channel “Soyougi” on August 17.
During the conversation, Soyou also reflected on how her attitudes toward romance and marriage have changed significantly as she has gotten older.
When asked to choose between a partner who honestly admits to cheating and one who hides the infidelity until the end, Soyou chose the latter. “I always say, ‘Go ahead and cheat. Just wait until I catch you,’” she said, explaining that she would immediately end a relationship once infidelity was exposed.
Soyou then revealed that she had experienced something similar herself. “There was one time when my ex-boyfriend cheated on me. I had a strange feeling about something, but I only found out after we broke up,” she said. The cheating itself was not the reason the couple ended their relationship. “We broke up for another reason, but it turned out that he had been cheating a lot,” Soyou revealed.
Looking back, Soyou said she feels less regret over the relationship itself than disappointment about the time she invested in it. “He wasn’t a good person. When I think about that time, I feel like it was such a waste. What was I doing with him during my flower-like years?” she said. She then jokingly corrected herself, changing “him” to the more blunt “that jerk,” which brought laughter to the conversation. Her comments suggest that, with the benefit of hindsight, Soyou now sees the relationship as an experience that took away time she considers particularly precious.
Soyou also opened up about how she behaves when she develops feelings for someone. She admitted that she can initially become unusually quiet around someone she likes. “At first, I actually can’t talk very well in front of someone I like,” she explained.
However, once she gets a sense that the other person may feel the same way, Soyou said she becomes much more direct. She would simply tell them, “I like you.” The singer also made it clear that she has little patience for romantic mind games. “I don’t like calculating things. I really hate playing hard to get,” she said.
Soyou also revealed that her attitude toward marriage has changed significantly over the years. When she was 23, around the time she was promoting SISTAR’s “Alone,” she genuinely viewed getting married before 30 as part of her life plan. “At the time, what I wanted to accomplish as a singer was my career goals, but my ultimate goal in life was to become a mother,” she recalled.
She even seriously considered freezing her eggs. Soyou had looked into the process with the intention of freezing her eggs after turning 30 and taking better care of her health. However, she ultimately decided not to proceed after learning that the preparation involved giving herself daily injections.
Her thoughts about motherhood also changed during the COVID-19 pandemic. Seeing young children unable to freely go outside during that period made Soyou think more deeply about the realities of raising a child. By around the age of 32, she said her desire to get married had also diminished. “If I’m not going to have children, I don’t really want to get married. I’m not sure if I could live with one person for the rest of my life,” Soyou admitted. Her comments reflect a much more cautious attitude toward marriage than the plans she had envisioned in her 20s.
Despite becoming less interested in marriage, Soyou said that if she does eventually decide to marry, she would definitely want to live with her partner first. Her reasoning comes from her own experiences of sharing a home with others. Soyou previously lived with her SISTAR members in a dormitory and has also lived with her older sister. These experiences taught her how important it is for people in a relationship to have compatible lifestyles.
She wants to know whether two people can genuinely live comfortably together before making a lifelong commitment. In particular, Soyou pointed to subtle differences that are difficult to recognize while dating, such as differences in preferred room temperature and everyday habits.
Soyou’s ideal type is also less glamorous than one might expect. Rather than focusing primarily on physical appearance, she said she values self-care and maintaining a healthy lifestyle. “If someone says they’re not interested in exercise, I think my interest in them decreases,” she admitted.
She previously joked that her ideal type was “a man with a nice butt,” but clarified that she was not actually focused on one specific body part. Instead, she was referring to someone’s overall appearance, how well their clothes fit, and whether they consistently take care of themselves.
From her reflections on infidelity to her changing views on marriage and motherhood, Soyou’s latest conversation offered a candid look at how her approach to relationships has evolved from her 20s to her 30s.
Sources: donga